Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Salsa part DUE

Read down to the next orange header if you are looking for my posts about Tuck. And/or the 'f words.

About the salsa....

All the recipe's I could find were very personalized. And sorta weird. And very, very hard to copy and paste...

Here's what I've added - please post comments:

Half a head o' cilantro - finely chopped - bout 1/4 cup.

Two tears off of the head of Italian Parsley - bout a two tbsp's - Italian Parsley has about a fifth of the 'taste' that regular parsley does.

Four tomatoes - not peeled. They need to be ripe enough that cutting them yields no real resistance, but young enough that they don't make a disturbing sound when you slice them. Okay, maybe a small utterance is pardonable, perhaps even (un) expected. Likewhat an upper crust lady might do during 'tea' after her favorite chef served her garlic without warning.

OK... from here on out... I dunno...

Most of the recipes call for an unholy amount of limejuice. First time out of the gate, I'm going to lather in a conservative amount - 2 tbsp

They also give out a shout to either no peppers or six peppers. I'm split it towards the 'afraid of adding' and just add one.

Also, she HATES onions... except when it's in her salsa. I'm going to add just "friendly" Texas Yellows at this point. And only a partial bit 'o one. These things are HUGE, so I'm going to slice off a sixth and dice it up.

Next up the recipe calls for two cloves of garlic. See above. I'm going to use 'minced garlic' from Costco - two tbsp - not so reactive. Lol sweetie. Also not so reactive in the mouth. Plus the minced garlic doesn't leak out your pores for the next five days.

Finally, the recipe I have been reading calls for 'salad oil'. Get more generic? I 'swigged' a costco botle of olive oil about one and a half times.

So... where does this leave us?
Prob with my wife hating the salsa a bit. But, it distracted me for quite awhile.

G'night friends

I feel pain... therefore I make salsa

I got really, really pissed at myself when I was driving home tonight. 'Bout halfway home, I started crying. It was a stupid and oh-so-self-centered thing to do, but I couldn't help myself.

Now that I'm home, I no longer have the option for that sort of indulgence.

Earlier today, Ames, my wife and one of my two best friends in this world, took my other best friend to the vet. His name is Tucker. He is the black lab my dad is petting in the picture to the left. It was taken a little over a year ago during Easter '07.

He's had a bump in his side for awhile. It came on fast and it was HUGE. We took him in, and the vet, after a great bit of difficulty, took some blood samples from the "bump" and sent them in for a biopsy. Turned out ok. In her defense, it was hard to get a good sample.

So, anyways (hard to write coherently) it wasn't. He's got cancer and it has permeated the muscle in his leg.

It's not his first experience with Really Bad Shit. He had Parvo as a pup - which pretty much screwed him for life, both with trying new food and knocking his immune system to hell. For those not in the know, parvo actually eats your stomach lining if you are a dog. It rots out like Gangrene and then you spew it everywhere. The stomach lining is purplish gray and it sits in many, many pools of reeking, fetid blood. (Looking for the recipe still? :))

Because of the Parvo, he has had allergies up the ying-yang which we have gone to war with every single spring and summer since moving up here.

He also tore his rotator cuff, probably put his foot in a hole running across our fields. He has prosthetic tendon because of the surgery.

But all of that. ALL of that, could be dealt with by simply internalizing a certain viewpoint we sometimes can choose to adopt in life - "It's only fucking money." And. "If we throw enough money at it, it will go away". It's surprising how many things that applies to when you get right down to it.

And it has. 5k and counting...

But here is the #&$damn difference. I'm really not sure it will this time. But I'm prepared to throw as long as... goddamit I don't know. I really, really don't. I am prepared to throw whatever it takes at this problem. But... I don't want to torture him doing it. and hereis the fucking thing - mybiggest fear is the 'smallest bill' when he follows one of us up to the vet and ... crap i'm crin again.


Alright, to answer The One Big Question people might have when they read this... "Why, it's only a dog?" ... here is my overly emotional answer, in multiple parts.

1. If you ask that, you don't get it.
2. No, it's not the same as if this was happening to my son, but it's pretty damn close.
3. Yes, they live less time than us, but extending that time is our payback for what they give us.
4. No, I don't know when that time is.
5. Yes, I could give examples of why I feel it's important - from the time my job at the studio, my dream job, vanished and he sat at my side for nearly a week leaning his head against me at my parent's vacation home in BB, to where he sat between my wife and the nearest door guarding her while she breast fed, to how I can work at night and not worry too much about her. Too... I dunno, he is one of my best friends. Do I really have to explain more?

Anywho... on to the salsa. The reason I am going to try out some salsa recipes is two fold. My wife LOVES salsa (she deserves it after today), and it masks my smell - the reason I got pissed at myself crying when I drove home - Tuck smells the stress and does his best to stress along with me. For example, every time I have... gotten... emotional in this post, he has dragged himself up a bit. So I dig back into the post. Grammar and spelling are MAGIC when it comes to making you emolate indifferrence.

Oh, and salsa really is a first rate BASTARD to make. You have to CONCENTRATE (it finds any unknown open pore or errant swipe of the eye and rewards it with 12+ hours of throbbing pain). Which means I can sit in the kitchen with my best friend and watch over him without stressing him out.

Here is the recipe I am starting with... (APPEND... the damn thing keeps, I dunno, inheriting the styles from whence it came. It keeps cutting off the words. So I can't comment on, and update, the recipe. I'll make it tonight and update tomm. Ok?)

Source: Sunset Mexican Cookbook


1 small onion, finely chopped
1 cup chopped fresh cilantro (coriander)
1/2 cup each chopped parsley and salad oil
6 tblsp lime juice
3 tblsp distlled white vinegar
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 jalapeno or other small hot chile, stemmed, seeded and minced

Mix onion, cilantro, parsley, oil, lime juice, vinegar, garlic, and
chile in a nonmetallic bowl. Makes 2 1/2 cups.


OK!!! Back to me. This is a VERY good starter recipe. However,

Saturday, March 29, 2008

The Scones

Today a co-worker of mine was kind enough to give me a recipe he cajoled out of a popular restaurant. There is a place you can go in my neck of the woods where the food is slightly better than alright, overall (smallish steak, stay the hell away from the chicken), but what everyone goes there for is the scones.

The honeybutter and scones. OH THE HONEY BUTTER AND SCONES!!! It deserves the all caps. If it was up to my wife, I'm pretty sure that if it was between me and the scones - my son would be calling the scones 'Papa' and asking them why I send them money every month. And who my blonde friend is.

Not that I would blame her. Every time I take a bite, I worry that weird looking babies with stork wings might descend out of the ceiling and fill my arse with arrows. Properly accompanied with harp music.

I am very grateful for the recipe, (sers, j thank you) but it was a little confusing.

The first paragraph reads "Sourdough Starter: 1 1/2 cups and 1 tTSB all purpose flour - 1 cup tepid water - 1 tsb yeast."

What the hell does "1 1/2 cups and 1 tTSB all purpose flour" really mean? There is no reference to the order in the next paragraph. Sers - What the really, hecking, heck does that additional "1TSB" refer to?

Do you put the "TSB" in first? (by the way that should read TBSP) Or the yeast??? Or the two and a half frikkkkkin cups of all purpose flour. ..?

I dunno. Sooo, like every IT dork, or any doctor that you REALLY count on (C that would be the guy with the 'DitchWitch' in your ribcage) I promptly Googled it...

The most aggravatingly and thorough reference to "sourdough starters" that I could find was this one, and he's... a little... intense.

Here is the link...

Full disclosure: it's like listening to Trekkers blathering on how the Vulcans really COULD take the Romulans in a fair fight.